between life and death

i was striving to breathe.
i was kicking for air.
the more i tried, the more i realized that my effort was in vain.
have you ever felt it? the near death experience?
i could feel my lungs were burning. God, it was painful.
it was a slow death. i didnt like it one bit.
funny, i used to tell myself that i should die peacefully on my nice warm bed.
life has always a way to amuse me.
i figured the only way to save myself is to not too.
why bother trying when it is destined that i die this way?
why bother propelling with my legs and arms when the water kept gushing into my mouth and nose without mercy?
surely this slight twist of event in my life meant something.
this clearly showed that i was meant to die this way. in this muddy water. disgracefully.
all the written duties and responsibilities were all lies and deceits.
cough cough.
i read out a silent prayer praying for a better life after death.
suddenly, those light-flashing moments came into view.
the movies werent kidding. the myth of these moments exist.
i saw my mother, my father. the people who i never really got to know.
a few acquaintances i met during my journey.
madam grief. oh yes, madam grief. her face was the most vivid.
i could still hear her words of wisdom.
and of course derek.
derek...
at that moment, the only thing i could think of, was how heavy my body felt.
my head was spinning uncontrollably.
as my eyes were slowly closing, i could see something was moving closer to me.
my first thought was a predator. but then again, it looked more like a human.
a human?
am i saved?
wow.
saved.
wow...
....
.....
......
.......
then everything went black, sucked in an abyss black-hole.  


p.s. i found this piece in one of my books i wrote a few years back. i tweaked it a little bit. lol