BOOK REVIEW: Fangirl - Rainbow Rowell (SPOILER ALERT)

It's approximately 1.04 a.m. as I start writing this sentence on a Friday. I have less than 15 days 'till my finals and yes, I'm nowhere near finishing my revision. It's amazing how I tend to do other crazy things that I wouldn't do when I'm not supposed to study like finishing a book in one day!! I have to write this review now and actually just a few seconds as I finished the book because I'm so infuriated!

Oh before that, assalamualaikum to my readers. If I have any.

OK, back to this post. This is not the first time I'm doing this. I remember back in high school where I finished one book in 3 days a week before my SPM trial and another book in 2 days a week before SPM and mind you, they were heavy stuff. Dan Brown heavy.

But this book, I actually bought a few months ago out of pure curiousity and I'm not going to lie - because of the cover page. It was so girlish and cute that I just had to pick it up. Instead of waiting for the Big Bad Wolf sale, I paid RM 35 for it. So immediately after I bought the book, I read a few chapters for 2 days and then I completely stopped due to a forgettable reason. Probably because I didn't have to study back then.

The first few chapters were OK. Like any other YA books you might have read. I'm not an expert when it comes to writing but I personally feel that this book didn't have a proper storyline.
It was basically just a girl who had problems at home because her mum left her, her twin sister and her father. The abandonment took a huge toll on all of them as her father had a few cases of manic relapses, her sister took up heavy under age drinking and her being a bit antisocial.

So this afternoon as I was studying for my finals, I picked up this book and continue from where I had left off and I couldn't stop reading because I was interested in knowing what happened next to all of the characters Rowell had introduced and I had learned to love and whether or not Cath (the protagonist) will ever sell her first book (she's an English major and her fiction-writing professor's pet).

Unfortunately, I didn't get what I wanted.
They were so many questions left unanswered. So many that I began to feel that Rowell purposely did this to me because she might want me to conclude them on my own which I find very cruel and heart-wrenching.

Here are a few things I feel that Rowell should have clarified or at least attempted to and the things I don't like about this book:

1) I hate the fanfiction/book about Baz and Simon. Oh God, it's so similar to Harry Potter that I feel like it's just a sad ripped off from the mega saga. I personally think that it's a lazy example of a fiction to put in a book. At least make it not so predictable like a fallen angel or a werewolf or even if you have to put in a wizard, make it about a girl instead. I skipped most of the fanfiction/book sections of the book.

2) Can we just take a moment and realized that a huge part of this book was about Cath's family issues regarding her walk-out mother but it was poorly explored. Laura (the mother) left them when they were really young and I could totally see her as a bitch and suddenly wanted to reconnect with them which was kinda nice but again almost at the end of the book disappeared. There was no coherent message to her disappearance, appearance and re-disappearance. I feel like it's not necessary to put her appearance in the book just to tell the readers that she didn't want to stay but she was just checking up on them. Which was weird. I'd feel a lot better if she appear and then disappear in a way that would hurt them more, because that'd make more sense on not just disappear but still become friends with one of her daughters on Facebook. It's just weird that the family's misery is not exploited deep enough and it's sad that there were no values that could be taken out of this because Laura was not given a backbone in this story other than being a selfish bitch.

3) Wren had alcohol poisoning and she fought with her best friend Courtney due to unknown reasons. I feel like Rowell owed Wren a few explanations on what happened to her and Courtney and why did she let herself get wasted all the time. There were no concrete reasons to her behaviour. I assume she was just experimenting as a new college student but that just sounds vapid and I hate to think that Wren is vapid because she didn't sound like one. A brat, maybe, but not vapid.

4) They were be a lot of almost sex scenes of Cath and Levi that were so awkward to read and didn't feel natural or human.

5) There was no distinct flow of the story. No beginning, no ending, no climax. I'M UTTERLY CONFUSED BY THE PLATEAU STATE OF THIS BOOK.

6) Why didn't that bastard Nick get kicked in the balls by Levi? or Wren? or better yet, Reagan?!!!

7) I wish I could read more of Cath's final project "Left" instead of just a short insignificant snippet of it.


OK, I'm done. I think I trashed this book miserably. I did love the characters though. I think they were perfect for the story. Just not well developed. I give this book 4/10.

I heard great reviews from her previous book Eleanor and Park which I'm definitely going to give it a read. Hopefully it's different from this one.


*sigh

Where are all the good books at?!

Signing off,
Yours truly.

Phoebe: Hey, Jake.

Jake: Hey. 

- He reluctantly answers Phoebe and continues talking to Kale.

Phoebe: So... this upcoming Spring Fling, do you have a date yet?

Jake: Err... yeah

- He lies. He doesn't have one.

Phoebe: Oh, OK. Erm, later then.

- She walks away, her head lowers down - her bangs almost covering the lenses of her thick glasses.

- Jake chuckles.

Kale: What the hell was that?

Jake: What?

Kale: Why did you blow her off like that?

Jake: Dude, she's a total nerd!

- Kale breathes in deeply...

Kale: Are you really in the position of rejecting an opposite gender attraction of that singular female who apparently is not to your petty liking solely on the ambiguous fact that she is called upon as customarily termed ‘nerd’ by the pretentious, bootlicking, vapid and shallow-minded people – members of the self-proclaimed better-than-others society filled with grotesque, plastic-like, ‘the-good-kind-of-slutty’ female dogs and for the matter of fact that she could be the best thing that ever happened to you and would genuinely get and quote the crazy sci-fi references in your veins like they were her mother tongue language, stay by you eventhough you’ve made injudicious slip-ups and most of all, accept the intangible fact that you snore like a badly-played French horn and your other awkward flaws but still have the same affection or probably more towards you in the next century because she understands the absolute fact of human evolution when it comes to physiques and sometimes personalities?

Jake: You’re an absolute jerk. 

 - Jake runs after Phoebe and starts talking to her.

- They're laughing. Like actual happiness.

Kale: I’ve done well.    

Currently.

Assalamualaikum (peace be upon you).

It's been awhile hasn't it? 

As I'm rearranging my jumbled words in my head to type a 'relevant' post, - typing and deleting, typing and deleting, typing and deleting, oh the endless vicious cycle - I'm enjoying Mraz's soothing voice serenading me halfway in reverie. Accompanied by three beautiful people literally across from me. Minding their own business. Despite everyone putting their music on, eyes glued on their gadgets' screens letting only the sound of the fan whirling and the wind blowing gently from the unclosed sliding doors filling the stuffy atmosphere, we seem to be contented. Well, at least I am.

I've forgotten the joy of simply just writing. Based on real-life experiences or most often than not my imaginations running wild. The last time I tried getting creative with writing - for God-knows-how-long ago - I sort of put myself in a state of apical depression. When my thoughts were no longer making sense whilst I put them in readable sentences, I immediately stopped and sighed. "Astaghfirullah. What's wrong with me?"

It's true you know, "practice makes perfect" even if you're a prodigy child (I'm not one, I'm just augmenting the significance of the phrase).

For whatever odd reason, I feel like writing even when my thoughts are currently asking me to stop and put myself to rest. But it feels wrong to succumb to that way of living. Procrastinating, lazying and mopping around waiting for the hours, days and weeks to past so that I could... well, move on. The fact that I know it's wrong is what frustrates me the most, because I'm not doing anything about it. 

By the time you've read this, you might think I'm depressed but I assure you, I'm not.

True, I feel lost right now. This is how I usually feel whenever exams are near and I have so much to study yet I'm not doing anything because disappointments are my worst enemy.

Elaboration regarding this feeling I shall not do here because it's not something foreign, in fact, majority of homosapiens feel it. And I'm just one of the billions. 

I stop having expectations on people the minute the people I used-to-love hurt me. 

Life laced with success and so much happiness does not come to you serve on a silver platter (or gold whichever you prefer), that, I'm aware of. 

But you can't help it can you?

You can't.

Sometimes, being in super control of your life feels slightly generic to a point that you seem heartless and emotionless.

I guess, I am now heartless and emotionless.

Mute and dumb to people's pleads for attention. 

I also realize now that I hate confrontations and dramas in my life that I'd rather watch movies instead of going out and meet people to befriend with.

Anti-social: Level 1.

As I'm writing this sentence, I still have no title for this post because I initially wanted to write regarding my 2014's resolutions...

but then again...

they're the same every year.

Oh God, I've not done anything for the past few years...

2014 shall be the turning point.

Let's start with studying for finals. Coming in t-minus 1 month. 

Wish me luck.

Yours truly.

p.s. After this post script message, I'll write the title to this post.